My milk cures stuff…seriously.

Yesterday meatball woke up with a swollen bloodshot eye full of gunk. Instead of a frantic call to her pediatrician (who is on speed dial by the way) I decided to try a remedy I read about online. I squirted meatball’s eyes with breast milk and instructed her sitter (aka my mom) to put some expressed milk on her eyes later in the day. I know right…sounds pretty crazy…and it must have looked crazy. There I was aiming my boob at meatball’s face squeezing my nipple…I couldn’t help but laugh. I felt crazy and like a complete loon, but I didn’t want to take her to the doctor right away.

Anyhoot, weirdness aside, this remedy actually worked. By the time I got home from work her eyes were clear and no longer swollen. I was amazed, so I started thinking of what other ailments could be cured by breast milk. Check out the list and descriptions below. Some are downright freaky and will remain untested by me :-/. Who knew? Breast milk is freakin’ magical.

Pink Eye: Breastmilk has the ability to treat and cure eye infections such as Pink Eye. All you need to do is to squirt the milk into the infected eyes. You should do this frequently as possible until the eye is completely healed. If you were treating your infant’s eyes for Pink Eye, the best result would be to wait until the baby is asleep. Some babies can be treated while awake, however, it may be difficult. You should squirt the milk around the crease of the closed eye and then gently lift the eyelids and allow all of the breastmilk to seep into the closed eye.

Sore Cracked Nipples: Many new mommies experience the pain and discomfort of sore cracked nipples from breastfeeding their newborn. Creams and oils can work wonders, however, the best medicine lies right inside of the breast. Breastmilk can be rubbed around the sore areas of the nipples after feeding and then left out to briefly air dry.

Mosquito and Ant Bites: Breastmilk is a sterile disinfecting concoction; so placing the substance on insect bites can actually work wonders. You should squirt a little milk on the bites and rub in thoroughly. This will help to stop the itching that may be caused by the insect bite.

Acne/Eczema/Diaper rash: Breastmilk can help to clear up these nasty skin disorders. All you need to do is to wash the infected area of the skin with clean water, and then you can apply the breastmilk all over the infected area. You should then let the milk air-dry.

Facial Cleanser: Breastmilk holds the ability to clean the skin very well. You should apply the breastmilk on the face and wipe it clean. Believe it or not, breastmilk can remove eye makeup.

Sore Throat and Mouth Sores: You should breastfeed your baby if their throat becomes sore. If you get a canker sore you can swish a little breastmilk around in your mouth for several seconds. This will help to heal the infection.

Stuffy Nose: If your infant has a stuffy nose, all you have to do is squirt a few droplets of milk into the nose and then suction or squeeze out; follow the same procedures as you would for saline.

Immunity Boost: If your older children are getting sick or they just need a little pick me up, you can give them breastmilk in order to boost their immune system.

Plugged Eye Ducts: If your infant’s eyes are plugged you can squirt breastmilk into the eye crease at the nose. You should do this four times the first day and only two the day after.

Scratches, Burns, Gouges, and Scrapes: These can all be treated with breastmilk. You just have to squirt and rub breastmilk on the infected area. Then you let the area air-dry and then bandage as normal.

Sexual Lubricant: Males can squirt the breastmilk directly onto the penis in order to use as a lubricant during sexual intercourse. Females can hand express the milk into a sterile cup in order to do this. Breastmilk can be used the same as a couple would use Vaseline, KY Jelly, or Astroglide.

Contact Lenses: For people who wear contacts, running out of solution during dyer moments can be one of the most frustrating and eye painful situations. Remember, breastmilk is a sterile substance, so you can use the milk the same as you would solution for your dry contacts or to clean them.

Eye Puffiness and Redness: You can squirt breastmilk into the eye to cure puffiness and redness.

Breast Cancer: Breastfeeding your infant is one of the best ways to prevent breast cancer from developing in you. Breastfeeding provides a means of protection for you from getting the disease.

Chicken Pox: You can use breastmilk to help ease the pain of itching by using the same as you would Calamine Lotion or any other ointment.

Leg Ulcers: You can squirt breastmilk on leg ulcers in order to clear them up.

Chapped lips/skin: All you have to do is express a small amount of breastmilk onto the fingers and wipe over the lips/skin. Do not rub the milk in; you should leave the area a little wet.

So which one of these will you be trying soon? Am I the only one that is kind of wishing for a paper cut so I can put my BM on it? (Yeah…I’m a weirdo). And really…my BM can remove my waterproof mascara? OMG…that’s kind of scary.  Anyway, Enjoy! you may not try any of these, but at least you know a little more ;-)

9 thoughts on “My milk cures stuff…seriously.

  1. My mom use to do that to my sisters and I when we were little…I use to find it disgusting but it was the only relief for pink eye.
    Interesting for the other things BM is good for!

  2. If I would have known this while I was breastfeeding I would have never stopped and made so money selling natural remedies lol

  3. Hey Val, Yes I also used breast Milk for my baby, he had a clogged eye duct and it WORKED!! Its soo amazing liquid gold I tell you.. liquid gold!

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